By Simon Brown

Auld Broon relates the tale of when Bingo Bremner, the well known N.E. entrepreneur, had to relinquish his driving licence. Simon also makes mention of Bingo's earlier days in the army.


Then Bingo met the minister and unto him did say,
I think well haud communion though its not communion day,
But the label on that bottle, it didna mention wine,
Bingo said there must be some mistake but it tastes very fine.



But Bingo was a wealthy man, Croan couldna haud him doon,
He wis voted District Councillor for a the country roon,
Now Bingo boucht a brand new bike complete with pump and bell,
And Bingo said to Croan in Banff, man you can go to hell.



That men they sat and blethered, nae mention o the kirk,
When Bingo said that hed go home for his wark he couldna shirk,
But Bingos vision was impaired, the white lines he didna see,
When the polisman advised him hed had too much barley bree.


Now the minister met wi Bingo, it was on a future day,
Says the minister to Bingo man youve led me far astray,
For there will be no happy land, neither here nor far away,
And there will be no more communion unless it is communion day.



Bingo got an invitation fae a man in Banff cad Croan,
Now Croan he says to Bingo, youll be the man fae Foggieloan,
But if youll gae me two hundred pounds, Im sure you will agree,
Tae lock your car intae the garage a the year o Eighty Three.



Now when the war was at its worst and this country lived in fear,
Bingo Bremner squared his shooders up, said hed stay nae longer here,
Now Bingo got upon a boat bound for
He said that Germans were great men but hed quickly let them see.


Now Bingo wis Lord Provost, he wid never live this doon,
For it wid be richt gossip for, the folk in Foggie toon,
It wid be richt threed for a story for a man they cad Auld Broon,
For he wid scandalise him for a' the country roon.


Now Bingo fixed his bayonet, gave one infernal roar,
The German army did retreat for they could take no more,
Now Hitler called for Goering, they would hold a conference,
The only thing that they could do was strengthen their defence.



Now Bingo walked doon through that streets like a man in great despair,
He well knew that his character was far beyond repair,
The minister gaed up his job, he could nae longer bide,
And he boucht a hoose in Marnoch out by the Deveronside.


Some folk said Hitler shot himsel, some said he died o fear,
For that man had never been the same since Bingo did appear,
Then Goering flew the country, he knew the end was nigh,
When he saw Bingo wi that bayonet, it would be a terrible way to die.

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Copyright Mrs E Henderson 2004
No part of this poem may be reproduced in any form without the prior permission of the copyright holder or Simon Brown's  family.

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